Going Back Again

Looking back it's almost been a year since my last blog on here. Since then I've been keeping up with a few other personal, class and business blogs; so I guess I can say I've not been lazy on blogging. It seems that I'm always on here when I get inspired or receive some sort of revelation that I need to expound on for a moment. That being said...

Life is lived in moments, some of those moments are very defining, sometimes they're not. However, when most of you think about your life your mind probably goes to a few defining moments that will forever live in your memory. Most of mine come from either personal mistakes or from invitations from God. Recently those have came together at the same time for me. This weekend was a good reminder for me for the importance of being refreshed in the presence of God. It's easy to be in and around it all the time without it changing your life. Religion will tell you that it's impossible to be around the presence without your life being changed, but I beg to differ. God is constantly extending invitations to all of us to a better life and a closer walk with Him, it's up to us wether or not we accept those invitations. 

I'm just glad to know that no matter how many times I've ignored the nudging of the Holy Spirit that He didn't give up on me. God will always pursue you until He grabs ahold of you and then it's your job to turn and pursue the Lord. It takes discipline to walk this life, and discipline isn't always pleasurable. But the outcome of discipline is always fulfilling. So here's to going back again, to re-digging some of those wells and living life out of the top of the barrel and not the bottom. There's no better day than TODAY! So make today count!

Keep It Fresh!

Well after an amazing weekend at IHOP in Kansas City I’ve definitely found some old things revealed in my heart again. Probably the most important of that being that your personal relationship with Christ should be the number one priority in your life. Everything else will come out of this one central truth. For so long I had all this backwards, and it’s very easy to do this. I realized that in my personal life I had put way to much focus on the work of Christ and not the person of Christ. I found myself getting lost in all that I was “doing” for Christ, and somewhere in the middle of all that I lost what should’ve been my driving factor. It’s time to go back to my first love.

While driving up here the other day I remember telling God specifically that I cared nothing about doing anything else in ministry without feeling Him in the midst of it and that I wanted to find that place of pure worship once again. I remember years ago when I first experience the fullness of God I would be lost in worship and His presence for hours without realizing it. This weekend I found that place again, the overwhelming place of the presence of God where all things are possible and nothing can hold you back. I thought it was long gone or that I was flakey when I found it before…I was so wrong, haha. It one moment the fullness of joy and everything I had been missing came rushing back into my life, I don’t know how to begin to put into words. That being said the number one thing to keep in mind is that experiences are great, but eventually the feeling wears off. You have to take that experience and put it into everyday action to create something real and lasting. Sunday to Sunday will not cut it anymore, keep the fire alive and the relationship real and watch God work.

Just remember between every promise and every manifestation there is a place called the fight of faith where you have to stand and keep believing even after the emotion of the thrill of the promise has left you!

Lessons on the Road

Just walked in the door from a 4-5 mile run at 3:30 in the morning and I've come to the conclusion that some people never change, let me rephrase that, most people never change. It's a part of their nature. For some people it's their personality and that will change very little through life, and for another group of people it's maturity. If you aren't changing maturity wise then there's probably and issue, and you will keep having reoccurring cycles in your life. I speak this as much for myself as anyone else. Just what's on my mind after a defrag run. Now time for a shower and bed.

Friends...who are they?

I’ve been rather quite the past few weeks, having many things on my heart that I felt were all good enough to put into words but just didn’t take the time to. I guess it was more some personal processing than anything else. Tonight however there’s just something kind of reoccurring going through this old heart. That is true friendships. Before I think about tackling this let me just say that I try to be decent to everyone. That being said, do you have any true friends?

This was something I recently asked myself, because I realized that some of the people who said they were there for me or wanted to be in my life were just giving me lip service. Does that make them bad people? No way, of course not, it simply means that I wouldn’t consider them a friend but more of an acquaintance. We all have many acquaintances, but few friends. I’m beginning to find the people once again who are with me and for me all the time, not just when everything is going great or when it all falls apart. Lets put it out there people are fickle, there’s no need to question that. Don’t let that stop you from opening up, just be careful to the point that you open up to them. The best lesson I’ve learned in relationships is that everyone and I mean EVERYONE has motives. Some are good, some are bad, some are selfish, some are pure, but everyone has them. Discern motives quick, and evaluate the level of relationship that person can be. You probably don’t want to be taking life advice from someone who has no interest in your future and is just after a friendship with you because of what it means for them. Be your own person, not someone else’s puppet.

Having said this, I have no idea the point I’m trying to make. Sure, have healthy relationships in your life and exercise wisdom in all relationships. More than that I think I’m trying to say I’ve lost some amazing friends, even best friends, over stupid stuff. Over stuff that didn’t matter then and really doesn’t matter now. How long will I let pride keep me from having those friends back in my life? I think that’s a question we all need to ask ourselves from time to time. Maybe it’s time for a life check or reevaluation.

Price of Your Life

It’s funny as I sit here in Washington Dulles I’m beginning to feel more challenged than I remember in recent memory. Looking back on the last 7 days I can see the many different ways God has been speaking to me, through books, prayer, and life experiences. My current way of doing life will just not cut it for where I believe God is trying to take me and the calling on my life. There’s this misconception in life that I have heard countless times over; it goes something like this, “just roll with the punches and whatever happens deal with it on the fly.” Now to some extent I agree with this, you can’t always foresee all the situations that will occur in your lifetime. In my opinion my generation has been to content to just go through life being unintentional. In generations past your direction in life was somewhat determined by your family and the family business; you would follow in the footsteps of those before you. There is nothing wrong with this; however, there is a genuine longing for something new, something unseen, and something that will leave a mark.

I have no idea exactly what I would like to do with my life, but I know that I want to leave a mark on this place before I depart. I have come to the conclusion that I will not get sidetracked by money or chasing after success. Now I know what you’re thinking, I’m not saying I will not be successful or have money. Quite frankly I believe that I will be very successful, have more than enough money to pursue all my dreams and supply for my family. We have one shot at this thing called life; there are no mulligans in real life. What benefit would playing it safe be; where’s the adventure? I would rather have the regret of failure than the regret of inaction.

So I ask, what are you dreams worth? If there’s something that the baby boomers have taught us it would be that a house on the lake, another car, and a lavish lifestyle doesn’t satisfy all your desires. God gave us the desire to make an impact, and there is no substitution for that. Put up the Sam’s Cola and get out the Coca-Cola. If you ask me, I say put it all on the line for the dream, you can get more money, but you can’t get more time. Where are you placing worth?

What I Will To Do...

As I sit here studying, there’s a passage that grabs my attention and communicates with where many of us are at including myself. Romans 7 has pretty much nailed me down tonight. As you can see in the following verses it answers some of the age-old questions about why we do things or make certain decisions that are not what God wills for us to do.

Romans 7:7-25

7 But I can hear you say, "If the law code was as bad as all that, it's no better than sin itself." That's certainly not true. The law code had a perfectly legitimate function. Without its clear guidelines for right and wrong, moral behavior would be mostly guesswork. Apart from the succinct, surgical command, "You shall not covet," I could have dressed covetousness up to look like a virtue and ruined my life with it. 8-12 Don't you remember how it was? I do, perfectly well. The law code started out as an excellent piece of work. What happened, though, was that sin found a way to pervert the command into a temptation, making a piece of "forbidden fruit" out of it. The law code, instead of being used to guide me, was used to seduce me. Without all the paraphernalia of the law code, sin looked pretty dull and lifeless, and I went along without paying much attention to it. But once sin got its hands on the law code and decked itself out in all that finery, I was fooled, and fell for it. The very command that was supposed to guide me into life was cleverly used to trip me up, throwing me headlong. So sin was plenty alive, and I was stone dead. But the law code itself is God's good and common sense, each command sane and holy counsel. 13 I can already hear your next question: "Does that mean I can't even trust what is good [that is, the law]? Is good just as dangerous as evil?" No again! Sin simply did what sin is so famous for doing: using the good as a cover to tempt me to do what would finally destroy me. By hiding within God's good commandment, sin did far more mischief than it could ever have accomplished on its own. 14-16 I can anticipate the response that is coming: "I know that all God's commands are spiritual, but I'm not. Isn't this also your experience?" Yes. I'm full of myself—after all, I've spent a long time in sin's prison. What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary. 17-20 But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can't keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help! I realize that I don't have what it takes. I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time. 21-23 It happens so regularly that it's predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God's commands, but it's pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight. Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge. 24 I've tried everything and nothing helps. I'm at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn't that the real question? 25 The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.

Have you been at the point where I’ve found myself so many times? The point where you decide that you’re are going after everything that God has for you, and many times you know that will require you to take up a new way of thinking. It’s so easy to become encouraged through peer relationships, or people in the public eye, or even sermons to go out into the world and “make a difference.” For 95% of us we let it die within the first week or two of making that decision. Why is that? Romans 7 illustrates exactly why this happens.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the comment “dreams die during implementation.” Dreaming is the easy part, walking it out is where we often find ourselves upside down.

“ I can will it, but I can't do it. I decide to do good, but I don't really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don't result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time.”

This has been my story countless times, seems like every time I decide to go after my dreams that God has birthed inside of me I get hung up. After the dream or vision I feel like I can charge Hell with a water pistol and take over, this is usually short lived. Why? The best bet is because I try to do it out of my own strength and will. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 tells me:

9 And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

If I will just find the source of my strength then I can overcome all things. I don’t have to be a spiritual superman so to speak; I just have to be in relationship with the “Spiritual Superman Himself.” It would be like playing a game of 3 on 3 with Michael Jordan and Shaq on your team. You could take on anyone and be confident in a win. It’s just like this with God on your team. He’s in your corner, waiting for the ball; when the ball is in His hands it’s a certain victory, without question. Sometimes we need to take a step back, take the game out of our own hands and put in the hands of the One who has already won the final victory. Flip to the back of the book, we win!

The best things sting the most!

Beginning to realize that without having something in the right context you will lose that something. Mainly relationships...sucks but it's true. What do you do when you feel that you have something that you can't live without only to realize you're going to have to live without because through neglect you lost it? It's important to realize the meaning and depth of a relationship with someone before it's to late. I'm at a loss for words for what to say, all I know is that the hole that it created has so much uncertainty, fear, and love in it at the same time. It's like having an out of body experience while being in trauma on the operating table.